


Losing the Plot

by isaiah_is_the_blob



Category: Original Work
Genre: Explaining the Plot, Gen, Scheme Failed Before Takeoff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-04
Updated: 2020-04-04
Packaged: 2021-03-01 04:29:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 332
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23479252
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/isaiah_is_the_blob/pseuds/isaiah_is_the_blob
Summary: A hitman and his vampire daughter debate narrative structure.
Relationships: Miner turned bounty hunter & adopted vampire child
Comments: 1
Kudos: 2
Collections: RELEASE THE CRACKEN





	Losing the Plot

“So let me get this straight,” Melisende said. “I apply for a job at the bank. They hire me, despite the fact that I look 8. I work there for several weeks, or at least until I get the night shift. Then on a night when the moon is full I unlock the door and let you come in to complete the hit.”

“You forget the part when Dawkins hits you in the scuffle and I cry over your limp body.”

“Cry?”

“It adds more narrative resonance, and it’s a parallel to you watching my injured body after the tragic coal mining accident.”

The tragic incident with Rathman spoke of had been him knocking himself out with his own hammer and coming to hours after all the other miners had left, Melisende leaning over him with her fangs out. He’d screamed, then decided it was time for a career change. Assassins had more benefits than miners, and their union was at least existent. 

“I think that’s got more bathos than pathos. I once killed a man with an eggbeater for you. One little hit from a human knocking me out doesn’t even make sense.”

“Then just lay there and look limp, I don’t know! I still haven’t figured out how I get the bank to hire you.”

“Oh, so now we discuss the bank?”

“You’re the one who’s 800 years old, you think something up.”

“You’re the one making up the scheme, you figure it out.” She flopped to the ground suddenly. “I’m hungry. Have a blood bag?”

“Will a juice box suffice? Bloodmart was closed today, and you know my ethical objections to Amazon.”

“Fine.” She sunk her fangs into the CapriSun and slurped it up like a paper cup of ketchup. “Now, let’s see if your ID guy has a driver’s license. If I’m getting a fake job then we’re doing this the right way.”

“But narratively-”

“I don’t want to get arrested for not existing again. Cmon, let’s go.”


End file.
